197. Growth Starts Within You: How Self Awareness changes everything with Kimberly "Ms Kimmie" Murchison-Smith

Growth Starts Within You: How Self Awareness changes everything with Kimberly "Ms Kimmie" Murchison-Smith Ep.197

In this inspiring episode of the 90 Day Wins Every.Black Entrepreneur of Excellence Series, Coach SandyB sits down with Kimberly "Ms. Kimmie" Murchison-Smith, founder of A Dose of Growth, to explore the power of self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and intentional personal growth.

Kimmie shares how overcoming personal loss, emotional challenges, and years in a high-pressure legal environment inspired her mission to help others develop a healthier relationship with themselves. 

She introduces her workbook, Doses of Structure: Learning the Language of Self, and explains why understanding your inner dialogue is the foundation for stronger relationships, career success, and emotional resilience.

Together, Coach SandyB and Ms. Kimmie discuss:

• Why learning the "language of self" transforms every area of life
• How journaling and writing create lasting personal breakthroughs
• Managing stress without bringing workplace pressure home
• Building emotional intelligence in professional environments
• Using long commutes as opportunities for personal development
• How AI can amplify creativity while preserving your authentic voice
• The importance of community through Every.Black
• Why mental resilience is one of today's most valuable skills
• Preparing the next generation with confidence, structure, and self-awareness

This conversation is a reminder that true growth begins within. When you become intentional about your thoughts, your communication, and your mindset, you create a stronger foundation for every relationship, opportunity, and goal you pursue.

If you're ready to strengthen your mindset, improve your communication, and experience lasting personal growth, this episode is for you.

 Get your copy of of Ms Kimmie's workbook:

https://www.amazon.com/Doses-Structure-Learning-Language-Self/dp/B0FTCQ52P3

 Connect with Ms. Kimmie 

https://www.tiktok.com/@adailyadoseofgrowth?

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

You gotta get better with your mind as we're going through these changes in this system right now. We communicate through the internet. But what if the internet did go down and you had to sit still for about a day and a half? Would you be able to Episode 197?

SPEAKER_02 0:18

Welcome, new and old listeners. This is your host, Sandy B, and I invite you to enjoy this episode. Hello and welcome to another episode of the 90 Day Wins Every Dot Black Entrepreneur of Excellence series. And today I have Miss Kimberly Merchantson here with me today. How are you doing, Miss Kimmy?

SPEAKER_01 0:43

I'm doing wonderful today. Another great day to be alive giving thanks. How are you doing?

SPEAKER_02 0:49

I am doing well. I'm excited to talk to you today. So before we get started, I'd like for each guest to share a little bit about themselves and then we'll go into the particular questions. So if you don't mind, tell a little bit about yourself and then we'll get started.

SPEAKER_01 1:04

Okay, I'll tell you again. I'm they call me Miss Kimmy. My full name is Kimberly Marcison Smith. I'm in from New Jersey area, Mount Laura, New Jersey, originally from North Carolina. I'm a Southern girl, been in New Jersey area for maybe about 20 plus years. I married, been married for about 30 some years. I have a son, a granddaughter. I am also the founder of A Dose of Growth, a platform to help people get better with themselves, their mind, personal development. Yeah. I just love to interact and network with people and help people because energy matters. And as we know in this life, we need to give ourselves the best energy. So that's what I like to promote out with a dose of growth.

SPEAKER_02 1:51

Yes. I love that. So let's talk about a dose of growth. Based on what I'm learning about you, it says that a dose of growth focuses on helping people build awareness, structure, and emotional intelligence. So let's talk about what inspired you to create this platform and how has your own journey shaped its message?

SPEAKER_01 2:13

You know, I feel like it happened naturally from my own personal experience in life. We all go through various phases and, you know, setbacks that we need to learn from. I'm very fortunate with the experience that I went through in my life dealing with death, just myself, family issues, trying to get navigate through life. I was actually introduced to a morning motivation call through multi-level marketing. And when you're doing multi-level marketing, you have to be able to connect with people to speak. But at that time, I really wasn't quite ready because I was dealing with a lot of my own personal emotional issues. And I started to get on this morning call with everyone else, and it was really becoming like therapy, social therapy for me. And I met a lot of other people on the call talking and just opening up. And I started opening up. I decided I wanted to share my voice, which is something that's important that I see of analyzing myself, that every individual needs to learn how to do, and that is to share your voice. Whatever you're speaking to yourself inside, you know it affects you inside out. So I got up one day and I was kept getting on the call, and I was like running around saying, Oh goodness, it's time to get on this call. And I was like, I gotta get my dose of growth. And that's how I came up with the name of dose. That's how I came up with the name of dose of growth. Ever since then, you know, I never wanted to look back as a wife, a mother, sibling, just friends to change. I need I knew I needed to change myself, but in changing myself, I wanted to also help other people be aware of why you have to do it. Because, you know, if if you're a wife and you're become a parent, you are going to affect other people around you, your influence. So it's so important to get it right and balance it out because if it's not, your influence can be bad, not only for yourself, but for other people around you. And that's why I just it's very, very important to get that growth in a day, just a daily dose of growth. That's it.

SPEAKER_02 4:34

I love that for so many reasons. So, as someone with a background in litigation, legal support, how has your experience in that high-pressure, structured environment influenced the way you coach clients and personal growth and emotional balance?

SPEAKER_01 4:52

As you know, lawyers and in a legal environment, it's a lot of pressure. Things are constantly turning. I deal with a lot of litigation. Attorneys are very high-powered, moving people, and they need things to get done quickly. But you have to learn how to adapt to the setting, but with a calm approach. And I always say it's very important to recognize tone, you know, because sometimes people just might come off a little abrupt. You don't have to feed into that. You have to learn how to take your position and still be of support. And that's what I've learned how to adopt better um in the litigation environment or just life overall of getting better with that. So, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 5:35

So, in your workbook, doses of structure, learning the language itself. Do you have it there?

SPEAKER_01 5:42

Yes, I do have the workbook there.

SPEAKER_02 5:45

Cool, very cool.

SPEAKER_01 5:46

Um it's a I I'll tell you, doses of structure is like an extension of doses of growth. And I I wanted it to be on a structure basis for people to recognize why you have to have a structure in your life of anything that you're building, like a house, is a foundation of structure. Yeah. One of the no matter what you do in life, if you're in any type of business, finance, you know, technical, medical, how you communicate, everything is a language. And I think one of the most important languages that we have to learn is the language with self. And this is why I wanted to put this workbook together. And I did it as a workbook mainly because I feel we read, but we don't take the time to write enough about ourselves. So the questions in different areas of the book that I put together, I want people to recognize to really analyze you so that when you look at each topic and you go through the questions and you're writing, you really digest it better. Because when you write, writing is like an impression. And I feel like people are getting away from that. And if you look at it this way, remember years ago how it used to be when people would if they went like centuries, well, I'd say maybe fifty years ago. Let's say about fifty to a hundred years ago, when people would write letters. How long did it take for the letters to get there to people? It took time, it took time. But the the thought and the time of putting in the writing out a letter takes a lot here.

SPEAKER_03 7:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 7:30

And it's an impression. So when someone goes back and they read, it gets more personal to you. And this is why I'm saying about why we have to get better with the language ourselves and how we write. Most people don't even want to write a letter to themselves, but you should.

SPEAKER_02 7:46

I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 7:46

I'm having this conversation with you.

SPEAKER_02 7:49

You are spot on, in my opinion. I love to write, I love to journal, I love to go back and look at what I've written. So it's exactly what you said. The person that I was just five years ago, when I see how I was feeling at this time of year, what I was experiencing, I love to write. And I encourage my clients to take that time. You know, you're frustrated at your husband instead of going with all the emotion of it, take the time and put that emotion on the paper. Sometimes you're surprised at what comes out, right? Because you're taking that time. So I like what you said about learning the language of self. That to me is powerful.

SPEAKER_01 8:31

Yes, yes. It's one of the best forms of communication. If you don't have your communication right with yourself, you can't have a good way of communicating with others because that's why I always speak as a life coach. Um, and being married for so many years, I'm always trying to be mindful of my tone. That's very important because you can aggravate a situation or you can make it more smoother where the person that you're communicating with falls into the conversation with a balance and it joins in good. That's very important.

SPEAKER_02 9:09

I totally agree. So, along those lines, what does learning the language of self mean to someone who is in a professional setting and they are looking to gain that professional success? What advice do you have for that person who is looking to move up in their career and they are trying to figure out how they can use a tool like this to help them? What suggestion would you give them?

SPEAKER_01 9:36

Again, being mindful of your approach, posture, how you're speaking, asking questions, receiving responses back, being attentive. It's like, you know, for me, when I'm working with the lawyers, everything is you you have to pay attention. But being considerate and how you're responding back to them. And to be able to balance that with the pressure is important. Because I know we're all gonna be able to pick up on, like if we're dealing with something in a profession and we're under a crunch, a timeline, again, how are you communicating to yourself of dealing with what you gotta deal with? Are you gonna get agitated? And because that's gonna spill out if you do that. I mean, I I really tr make it a point. No matter what I'm doing, I just want to be mindful at all times. That's important. You really have to recognize that. So in a profession, because it goes a long way as a working together as a team. So I think that would help people to practice that more and just just be watch how you're asking a question or responding. Very important.

SPEAKER_02 10:47

Yeah, that's really good stuff. Thank you for sharing that. So when you think about the work you've been doing, what challenges have you experienced and how were you able to get past them to keep moving on your goals?

SPEAKER_01 11:03

I've had conflicts, but I I had to again learn a lot about myself. That's why I say it's so important to analyze you. Yes. I do remember there was a time where I would kind of bring it home. And I know my husband would be like, don't do that.

SPEAKER_03 11:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 11:19

And you have to be considerate of that because you know, when you leave one environment and come into another environment of your workplace and your personal life, your home environment, even your own personal space, you gotta learn how to not let it overlap. Especially if it was a bit of a challenging day. You gotta separate it out. And I think it's important for people to really when you even when you go to work and you take a break on your lunch break or whatever, sometimes you can't always be around everybody. You might need to just take that 15, 20 minutes for yourself to clear your mind, um, regroup. And then when you come home, again recognizing, okay, I'm getting ready to walk in the door to my love, my children.

SPEAKER_03 12:08

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 12:08

Let's let's be mindful to be kind enough and courteous to ask everybody how they're doing. I mean, I know we're all dealing with something, but then we can talk about it. I think it's important to recognize the timing.

SPEAKER_03 12:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 12:22

So I I'm gotten better with that. I can honestly say, I'm not gonna say being married that like, you know, there's I have no flaws. I had a lot of flaws in areas that I had to improve on. My husband can say, Yes, because I I I put him through a few things like it. But that's part of life of learning. That's what you have to be able to talk about it, but be able to share the experience out to other people so that they can relate to it and recognize that, okay, you know what? I can change this about myself. I can get better in this area. So you know what? It's a good feeling when you really adopt it as a lifestyle. It really helps you. Think better. You think better.

SPEAKER_02 13:06

I love it. It's so funny that you brought up in relation to, you know, your family and especially when you're coming home, because I read years ago, and it always stuck in my mind that the conflicts occur when you get home from work. And so you had to be mindful that you were entering a different space, and exactly what you said, bringing that energy into your home and how it causes conflict. So you have to be mindful. And I remember at the time where I heard that, I had a commute home. So I would make sure that I would make sure I was listening to music that was uplifting. And you know, I live here in Atlanta, and so at the time I would have to drive further out away from the city, and I would make sure that by the time I got home, my attitude about work was changed. And like you said, I was ready to move to that different space of time where I could be there for my family and be engaged. So I think that is spot on.

SPEAKER_01 14:12

Yes, and you know, when you just said that about driving, if any, you know, I would encourage people, if you do have a long commute, and sometimes people get a little frustrated when they're on a long commute, I also did it. I'm fortunate now that I'm closer, but I actually did a hour commute. And at the beginning, when I started doing this um social therapy for myself with coming in with the multi-level marketing, I was actually traveling every day on the road. But believe it or not, while I was traveling on the road every day, I would learn how to listen to Think and Grow Rich. I learned how to listen, pick up a lot of motivational speakers. And in listening to all these motivational speakers, the time went by better, but it also helped condition my mind so that when I would go to work, I mean, my mindset was completely different. So anybody that's traveling, that's an excellent time to really listen to audios, motivational speakers to learn how to train, discipline your mind to be more patient. You know, it took me four hours one time to get home, a couple of times in the snow, the bad weather. But you know what? I just kept saying, okay, I'm just gonna take my time, get get here safely. It helps you slow down.

SPEAKER_02 15:32

I love the fact that you said Think and Grow Rich because that is definitely a book that's been a huge change and help in my life.

SPEAKER_01 15:39

Yes. Um, if you're commuting home and you have a long drive in the day, I would encourage people to, you know, slow your mind down. Because sometimes the music is good to listen to, but I feel like over the length of time that I was commuting, I did learn a lot about being patient. Like I really, really learned how to slow down and just even if it was traffic on the New Jersey Turnpike, it just helped to discipline my mind. Like really um I would sometimes talk to my mom and dad, but they're you know no longer here in their physical form, but they live within me.

unknown 16:16

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 16:17

And it just helped me. I'm I'm very, very, I can honestly say thankful that I did slow down to really listen and analyze myself and chime in to other motivational speakers to help me be better with myself. And this is what I'm saying for people, because I hate, you know, I really hate to see and hear people when they, you know, they get on the road and I'll tell you from time to time my son has a little tendency of this to young people. You know, people get upset on the road because things are not moving the way they want, but you just gotta realize that if you think about it, if you're getting agitated and you you see somebody else driving and then they're a little driving, you know, like rushed. It says something about the person, but you should not wanna to adopt that. That's all I'm saying. Again, you want to just say, okay, wait a minute, maybe they just left out of the house too late and rushing.

SPEAKER_02 17:25

Let them go on. I'm gonna take my time here. Yeah. I don't like the people rushing behind me, you know, like trying to push you further. It's like you go ahead. I'm not in a rush. I want to be safe.

SPEAKER_01 17:37

Yes, yes. Definitely a dose of growth.

SPEAKER_02 17:41

Yes. So it's interesting because I want to envision someone right now as listening to this podcast episode on their commute, right? And it's a sweet spot because it's about 30, 45 minutes. So they are actually hearing you give them this amazing advice. And that's what I love about being a part of the Every Dot Black community because I'm able to be connected with people like you, Miss Kimmy. So I must ask you, how did you get connected with this community with Every Dot Black? Everyone has an interesting story, so I love to hear how everyone got connected with this community.

SPEAKER_01 18:17

Well, I'll tell you, on Facebook, I always get very curious about more networking and connections or people coming together in the black community.

SPEAKER_03 18:28

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 18:28

And one day I was online and that it popped up for one of the events. And I was very happy about it. I was like, oh, good, because we don't see enough of it. Yes. And so I went on and I was like, wow, I was very impressed with the just the setup, the people, the doctors, the professional people, just small business owners, just people thriving, but people that want to learn and that have a very good outlook about growing as black business entrepreneurs. So that's what happened. So when I saw them on Facebook and I went in, and then I just kept chiming in, you know, to their Monday meetings, and I did join, and it's been a great tool, um, a great platform for people that I don't think people realize how good it is.

SPEAKER_02 19:22

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SPEAKER_01 20:33

And it is a benefit for us right now because I think people, their focus is so much that for one, with AI, which is what we're talking about a lot, to help people with small as small business owners, is you it's so helpful. And since I've been on a few of the um mastermind meetings, I tell you, I've heard so many speakers come on and they have given so much information, like just good tips. And I'm like, wow, that it helped my mind to get more open to be able to say, okay, it helped me with doses of structure, it's helped me with Canva, it's helped me with my website, it's helped me in a lot of ways. So it's opened my mind up to say, yeah, you know, I need to really get a real good handle on using AI that can benefit me as well as affiliate marketing. They it's just, hey, every dot black is good is for us now. We need it. I mean, we need it. We really need it.

SPEAKER_02 21:36

Deal, we do. Thank you for sharing your experience because I like you feel the same way. I love those Monday night meetings. I feel that it is a jump start to my week. I know that if I'm looking for something, this community, I can ask the question. And there is someone on there that's going to know, that's going to say, reach out to me. Here's my contact information. So I like you agree. It is a great tool for entrepreneurs who are looking for a place where they can get fed, right? I really believe that this is a place if you're navigating this journey. So many people talk about being alone. Well, you don't have to be alone. You can come here, you can come get fed, you can continue to come back. One of my friends who's in Philadelphia, she has a childcare business. She came last week. She was buzzing so excited, and she was talking about AI. So I'm excited because sometimes we just have to tell our friends where we are and they show up and they see for themselves, right? So it's it's awesome to experience that. So you talked a little bit about it, but tell me a little about how you are using AI with your business.

SPEAKER_01 22:49

Well, I'm learning how to navigate. But what AI does help to do, and once I've started using it, it's almost like it knows me as Miss Kimmy, it does the crow. It just flows right. It is absolutely amazing. So whatever idea I come up with and I kind of put it in, it just like actually sparks it and enhances it better. Like so, if you if I look at my website and now that I'm I'm really understanding it more, it'll go, you know, you you can do this or add that to it, uh, the chat box. So many little things. And even with one speaker was on every dot and was talking about Canva, and I was like, wow, that's amazing. So, like just doing Instagram posts or Facebook posts, the way she was illustrating it, that how we could use it through Canva and pictures, I was really blown away because it's it helps your business of when you're putting social media posts out to people. I mean, I'm just I'm really want to continue to learn as much as I can about so yes, I feel you.

SPEAKER_02 24:17

It it's so exciting. I get excited to hear how different people are using it, right? Because each of us is all we're all unique in our ways we use it, but it's so exciting to hear that, because like you said, you are the creative. It starts with you. I like to say, and I say it a lot on this podcast, uh ChatGPT for me is an assistant. And so my assistant is only as good as how I train it, right? So you have trained your Chat GPT, so that's why it knows Miss Kenny, right? So you gave it good information. I love it. But see, those are the things that we learn with every dot black, so then we can have the confidence, right? We don't have to be fearful. How many people you know are thinking like, oh, ChatGPT is gonna take my job and they're gonna do this? And it's like, no, no, no, you're missing. We have an opportunity here, like you said, to be excited about the things we're learning to grow so we can be a part of this change.

SPEAKER_01 25:19

I think for anyone in any field, you could be in a plumber, self-employed, whatever you're doing, you can be you're an extension of your business. So what that's what is helping people that are taking our time to learn it, yeah, it will help them. And that's what I'm saying, you know, because I wouldn't never thought that I could expand my ideas out because sometimes you feel like you're kind of spinning wheels, but it really helps you move to the next level.

SPEAKER_03 25:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:51

It hacks on everything. It's just it's very, very impressive. And I would definitely say for people, instead of looking at it like it's gonna take your job, I would definitely say like every dot black offers to computer courses.

SPEAKER_03 26:08

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_01 26:08

It's important to take the courses to get better so that you can understand once again the language so that it can tie in with everything else in your life. Um, yeah, but we don't want to get we, as I always say our brothers and sisters, we should not want to get left behind. And I really want to say thank you to every dot black for just the efforts of doing what they're doing to try to help uh people out here. I mean, it really is a blessing.

SPEAKER_02 26:38

It sure is. So I want to talk to you about your hosting events because that is not an easy thing to do. To put on events and to host them. So you are known for your passion for hosting events and building community. So, how do networking and shared experiences accelerate personal development? And what do you hope participants take away from the gatherings that you curate?

SPEAKER_01 27:04

I've had some setbacks. I was I'm an MC. Um, I'm not sure if many some people may be familiar with Wilson's Restaurant Live Music Venue, which is in um South Jersey. And I've would also MC and host like corporate wedding events. My goal right now, believe it or not, I just literally came out the hospital Friday. I had to have a little procedure, but but I'm not gonna let it stop me. So before this year is out, with the doses of structure, what I want to do is to put together an event for people within the community to come out and I want to offer some of the books there to get people to kind of just take a few moments to tap into this self-analysis of you. Because right now, more than ever, I just want to say the events that I want to put together going into the new year. Yeah, yeah, is to really develop people develop themselves because I feel like a lot of people are afraid right now. We don't know which way the things are gonna happen. But I don't to be honest with you, Sandy, I look at this still being one of a blessing for us because even though we're dealing with a lot in a in a political sense, in a spiritual, mental, and social sense, yeah, we're supposed to be, we're gonna it's a challenge. But this is why we gotta this is why we gotta receive the challenge to enhance our minds as we're going through all these changes in the world right now. And that's one of the biggest things I would say to people right now, you gotta get better with your mind as we're going through these changes in this system right now. Because I tell a lot of people we communicate through the internet. But what if the internet did go down and you had to sit still for about a day and a half? Would you be able to communicate with you effectively to have faith and to stay encouraged in that moment of quietness? I think that's something that we all have to learn how to do. We're gonna have to do it.

SPEAKER_03 29:20

We have definitely yes.

SPEAKER_01 29:25

So that's what I always like to say as far as my events is people really appreciating whatever you're dealing with right then that you can get through it. You can get through it.

SPEAKER_02 29:37

That's a word that is a powerful word, and it is timely, just like you said, there's so much fear-mongering, there's so much concern, and there's a lot of talk around our mental health, right? And I see a lot of podcasts where people that we are familiar with, men, black men, are having conversations. I was just on a podcast where I was talking about a podcast episode that Kurt Franklin is putting together, I believe it's called Den of Men, where he's doing just that, Miss Kimmy, talking about mental health in men and having real deep conversation too, really good stuff. So I think you are spot on because this is a time where the people who have that mental toughness, right? From the years of experience that you talk about, that you are able to do just that, to share, to have these gatherings where you can help people walk through because you've already put in the work by creating your workbook, right? So they literally will get the structure that they are craving because I do believe you are absolutely spot on in that people are searching, they're fearful, and I think the way to get back to being aligned is understanding self. So I think you are spot on with.

SPEAKER_01 31:00

And I just wanted to add that I am coming out with some more workbooks. And the reason why I want to come out with more workbooks, and I would encourage the adults, I just want to say any adults listening or young people listening, but because they are the generation coming behind us. And a lot of people might go, no, I don't want to get involved. You have to get involved because I have your children, your grandchildren are coming behind. And if they don't learn how to understand their mind, they're already taking away cursive writing. So even just taking away cursive writing is a trap because when it comes back to one time in a time where they will have to read something, yeah, they're not gonna know how to read it because we didn't we didn't teach it back into home and we should teach it to our young children. So it's it's important, it's for the generations. I'm a grandmother, my granddaughter, I want to do a doses of structure for young girls because they gotta appreciate themselves as young girls growing into teenagers, into women. You are their mother. You will be a mother carrying your child. And if you don't have the right mindset, you're going to offset your child's mindset and behavior. So it's important. It's very important.

SPEAKER_02 32:22

Very good stuff. Thank you so much. This was so impactful because there is someone that's listening who needs this work, who needs this help, who wants to know that they can move on. So by hearing this message, they can reach out to you and they can connect with you. And I know I have your link information, but if you don't mind, would you tell everyone where they can get in touch with you, where they can get your book, and where they can continue to have and see what you're putting out on social media and other places.

SPEAKER_01 32:54

Yes, um, uh connect with me on my website at dosagrowth.com, TikTok, Instagram, Facebook at dosagrowth.com, Ms. Kimmy, and my book, Doses of Structure. If you can find it right on Amazon.

SPEAKER_02 33:07

Awesome.

SPEAKER_01 33:08

Everything's on my website in the links.

SPEAKER_02 33:11

Yes, yes. Thank you again, Miss Kimmy. We will be talking it. We'll have to have you come back when you're doing your next event so we can help you promote it.

SPEAKER_01 33:20

All right, and I appreciate you, Sand. Every dot yes, every dot black, love everyone, and thank you so much.

SPEAKER_02 33:27

Thank you. Wow, that was a powerful conversation. I hope you're feeling inspired and ready to take action toward your 90-day wins. Uh if today's episode gave you a new perspective or an extra push to go after your goals, I want to hear from you. Let's keep the conversation going. Share this episode on your socials and tag me at 90 Day Wins. I'd love to know your biggest takeaways. And if you're listening on Apple Podcasts, do me a favor, leave a five-star review and a comment. Your support helps more goal getters like you find this podcast and stay motivated on their journey. Remember, every day is a chance to win. Let's make it count. See you next time on the 90 Day Wins podcast.